Quotes by Dane Cook

• I had never done a roast, but I really wanted to, because it's so different from standup.
• You have to learn the crowd. I just pay attention to them so I can make sure I can make them laugh.
• When I first hit the scene, it was just a lot of go, go, go, go, go. I have a lot of natural energy anyway, but it was over the top.
• Vince Vaughn is a genuine person, awesome guy. He'll come to a lot of my shows. It's not that often that you can meet someone as cool as Vince.
• Christina can sing all the notes, but Britney is just hot!
• I am an observer, I like to watch people. I am into psychology and people - how they act and such.
• I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.
• I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.
• That MySpace is the story of the year. Everyone but my mother is on it.
• I get so into the moment.
• I like fearless characters, people just not afraid to do anything it takes to make people laugh.
• I like to play guitar, jam out, play the blues, go watch movies. I love movies.
• I'm a late-night guy.
• I'm always going to be someone that people enjoy watching.
• I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.
• I'm shooting a pilot based on my show. It's a one-camera show. I play myself.
• I've lived in LA for so long, I don't even know what is real and what isn't any more.
• If you use tact you can say anything, then make it funny.
• In school I was pretty quiet. Kinda shy until my junior year. But at home I was a freak.
• Jim Norton and Harland Williams always make me laugh.
• My fam is just a regular family. But all of them have great senses of humor.
• I don't write any of my material down. I like to improvise and be spontaneous.