Quotes by Roseanne Barr

• Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.
• Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with.
• I consider myself to be a pretty good judge of people... that's why I don't like any of them.
• The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.
• There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a hell of a lot more to being a mother than most people suspect.
• The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.
• I figure if my kids are alive at the end of the day, I've done my job.
• Excuse the mess but we live here.
• As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job.
• A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him. And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials. And then there's my personal favorite, the male ego.
• I was completely nuts for most of my life.