Marriage must incessantly contend with a monster that devours everything: familiarity.

Profession: Novelist

Topics: Marriage, Familiarity,

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Meaning: This quote by Honore de Balzac, a renowned French novelist, succinctly captures the challenges that are often encountered in a long-term relationship, specifically in the context of marriage. Balzac's use of the term "monster" to describe familiarity suggests that it is a force that can consume or destroy the vitality and novelty that initially characterized the relationship. The word "incessantly" further emphasizes the relentless nature of this struggle, implying that the battle against familiarity is ongoing and requires continuous effort.

In essence, Balzac is highlighting the inherent tension between the comfort and routine that come with familiarity and the need for novelty and excitement in a marriage. This tension is a common theme in discussions about long-term relationships, as couples often find themselves grappling with the desire for stability and security, while also yearning for the spark and passion that characterized the early stages of their relationship.

The concept of familiarity as a "monster" can be interpreted in various ways. On one hand, it can be seen as a metaphor for the gradual erosion of the mystery and allure that initially drew two people together. As couples become more comfortable with each other, they may start taking each other for granted, losing the sense of excitement and discovery that was present in the early stages of their relationship. This can lead to a sense of complacency and stagnation, as the familiarity becomes a barrier to growth and change within the relationship.

On the other hand, familiarity can also be viewed as a source of comfort and stability. It represents the deep knowledge and understanding that partners have of each other, the shared history and experiences that bind them together. This sense of closeness and intimacy is often cherished in a relationship, providing a sense of security and support.

However, Balzac's quote serves as a reminder that while familiarity can be comforting, it also has the potential to become suffocating if not managed carefully. The "monster" that he refers to may symbolize the risk of becoming too comfortable, to the point where the relationship loses its vitality and passion. It suggests that couples must remain vigilant and proactive in combating the potential negative effects of familiarity, and strive to keep the relationship fresh and dynamic.

The quote also implies that maintaining a successful marriage requires conscious effort and intentionality. Balzac's use of the word "contend" suggests that the battle against familiarity is not easily won, and that it requires active engagement and perseverance. This aligns with the idea that successful long-term relationships require ongoing investment and commitment from both partners.

In conclusion, Honore de Balzac's quote encapsulates the complex dynamics of familiarity within the context of marriage. It serves as a poignant reminder of the challenges that couples face in balancing the comfort of familiarity with the need for ongoing growth and excitement in their relationship. By recognizing the potential pitfalls of complacency and actively working to counteract them, couples can strive to maintain a vibrant and fulfilling marriage.

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