Meaning: This quote by Elizabeth Bowen, a renowned novelist, delves into the complex dynamics of love and relationships. The quote is thought-provoking and offers insights into the different aspects of love and the human psyche. Let's break down the quote and explore its meaning in detail.

"The wish to lead out one's lover must be a tribal feeling..." Here, Bowen seems to suggest that the desire to guide or lead one's lover is deeply ingrained in human nature. The reference to a "tribal feeling" implies that this desire may stem from a primal, instinctual urge to protect and provide for one's partner. It speaks to the innate human inclination to take on a leadership role within a romantic relationship, assuming responsibility for the well-being and direction of the loved one.

"...the wish to be seen as loved is part of one's self-respect." This part of the quote delves into the importance of being valued and cherished within a romantic relationship. Bowen highlights the significance of feeling loved and appreciated, indicating that it is intertwined with one's sense of self-worth and dignity. The desire to be seen as loved is not merely a superficial longing for affection, but a fundamental need linked to one's self-respect and emotional well-being.

This quote captures the intricate interplay between the desire to lead and protect one's partner, and the need to be loved and esteemed in return. It delves into the multifaceted nature of love, highlighting the primal instincts and emotional needs that underpin romantic relationships.

In the context of tribal societies, the concept of leading out one's lover may be linked to traditional gender roles and the provider-protector dynamic. Throughout history, many cultures have upheld the idea of men as the leaders and protectors of their loved ones, reflecting the tribal or communal structure of early human societies. The instinct to lead out one's lover may have evolved as a means of ensuring the survival and well-being of the tribe or community as a whole.

On the other hand, the wish to be seen as loved as part of one's self-respect touches upon the individual's emotional and psychological needs within a relationship. Regardless of cultural or historical context, the need for love and validation is a universal aspect of human experience. It is tied to a sense of self-worth and dignity, influencing how individuals perceive themselves and their place in the world.

In contemporary society, the dynamics of romantic relationships have evolved, challenging traditional gender roles and societal expectations. However, the core elements highlighted in Bowen's quote remain relevant. The desire to lead out one's lover can be seen as a metaphor for providing support, guidance, and protection within a relationship, while the need to be seen as loved reflects the universal longing for emotional fulfillment and validation.

Overall, Elizabeth Bowen's quote offers a profound reflection on the intricate dynamics of love and relationships. It delves into primal instincts, emotional needs, and the complex interplay between leading and being loved within the context of romantic partnerships. Bowen's insightful words resonate across time and culture, shedding light on the timeless aspects of human connection and the pursuit of love and self-respect.