The desire to get married, which - I regret to say, I believe is basic and primal in women - is followed almost immediately by an equally basic and primal urge - which is to be single again.

Profession: Author

Topics: Women, Desire, Regret,

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Meaning: This quote by Nora Ephron, a renowned writer, director, and producer, delves into the complex and often contradictory desires that women may experience in relation to marriage and being single. Ephron was known for her insightful and witty observations on relationships and societal norms, and this quote is a perfect example of her astute commentary on the human experience.

Ephron's assertion that the desire to get married is "basic and primal" in women may be interpreted as a reflection of societal expectations and traditional gender roles. Throughout history, women have often been conditioned to aspire to marriage and motherhood as essential components of their identity and fulfillment. This societal pressure can manifest as a deep-seated longing for marriage, rooted in the desire for companionship, security, and validation.

The notion of marriage as a fundamental longing for women can also be traced back to evolutionary psychology, which suggests that the desire for a committed partnership and family may be ingrained in human beings as a means of ensuring survival and the continuation of the species. This primal instinct to form pair bonds and create familial structures is posited as a fundamental aspect of human nature.

However, Ephron's statement takes an unexpected turn as she asserts that this desire to get married is swiftly followed by an equally "basic and primal urge - which is to be single again." This counterintuitive declaration challenges the conventional narrative that marriage is the ultimate goal for women and that once achieved, it should constitute a state of perpetual contentment.

By highlighting the almost immediate emergence of the urge to be single again, Ephron sheds light on the complexities of human desires and the fluidity of individual aspirations. This sentiment touches upon the reality that the grass is not always greener on the other side and that the pursuit of independence and autonomy can be just as compelling as the yearning for partnership.

Ephron's observation also confronts the societal expectation that marriage should be the pinnacle of a woman's existence, suggesting that the longing for independence and self-discovery is equally fundamental. It speaks to the idea that women are multifaceted beings with diverse desires and aspirations beyond the traditional roles prescribed to them by society.

In contemporary society, there is a growing emphasis on individual agency and the pursuit of personal fulfillment, which may contribute to the resonance of Ephron's words. More women are redefining the meaning of success and happiness on their own terms, challenging the notion that marriage is the ultimate fulfillment of their lives.

Ephron's quote provides a thought-provoking perspective on the complexities of human desires, particularly within the context of relationships and societal expectations. It invites contemplation on the intricacies of yearning for both connection and independence, and the ways in which these desires intersect and evolve over time. Ephron's astute observation serves as a timeless reflection on the nuanced and multifaceted nature of human emotions and aspirations.

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