Quotes on Jokes

I'm not Mr. Debonair Suave. I'm just a regular boy who goofs around, pulls pranks, and makes jokes. That doesn't sound very hot to me.

Author: Jensen Ackles

There's a few tunes of mine that don't have jokes, but most of them have a joke and they have a humorous point of view somewhere.

Author: Mose Allison

I reserve the right to tell shaggy dog stories or even common jokes as part of what I'm doing. I don't give a damn if half the audience walks out.

Author: David Antin

I never believe them when they say that because you really have to sort of be aware of what's going on in the news in order to get the jokes on the show.

Author: Samantha Bee

I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes.

Author: Sandra Bernhard

When I make a book, I make it for the child and not for the parent - no jokes in it for the parents!

Author: Dick Bruna

It's perfectly okay if you don't understand every single one of them. For one thing, I make a lot of corny jokes, and you have to be 40 years old to get some of them.

Author: Brian Cleary

In New York there isn't that weird palpable competitive thing where it's friendly but everyone isn't trying to top one another with jokes when you're just hanging around.

Author: David Cross

Different taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.

Author: George Eliot

Johnny Carson started the jokes about me and Marlin in his monologues.

Author: Jim Fowler

Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee, and I'll forgive Thy great big joke on me.

Author: Robert Frost

I like to hold the microphone cord like this, I pinch it together, then I let it go, then you hear a whole bunch of jokes at once.

Author: Mitch Hedberg

A civil servant doesn't make jokes.

Author: Eugene Ionesco

I guess they're tough jokes. But there's lots of things you either laugh or cry at. And you just can't cry.

Author: Sam Kinison

Soon I learned that the worse the puns and jokes, the funnier they could be, if you knew how to deliver them.

Author: John Lasseter

Our show was - it remained - you know, kids could watch it and laugh at it. And they wouldn't know - they wouldn't get the jokes. But they would laugh at it. So they tell me now they have grown up and they're watching it. Now they get the jokes. But we didn't say anything blatant.

Author: Rue McClanahan

Jokes are grievances.

Author: Marshall McLuhan

I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one.

Author: Marilyn Monroe

You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.

Author: Dylan Moran

My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe.

Author: Emo Philips

This is our lance. See, you're making me laugh about this now, because there have been a few jokes on the set about what they actually look like. But, see, I personally think they'd be a great toy. So... just batteries aren't included.

Author: Kevin Sorbo

I'm not a standup. I don't really have jokes. I don't have 10 minutes. It took a while for me to realize this.

Author: Julia Sweeney

I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes. I don't know how to tell jokes.

Author: Rainn Wilson

I recently did the David Letterman Show about my book. He was very serious and made no jokes and it caught me off guard a little bit. He was much more serious than some of the joke shows that journalists get on.

Author: Bob Woodward